There's this baby in facebook whom I've been following his story since his parents started making his personal blog. Since I was off on any sort of social contact to take care of myself, I havent had the chance to follow anymore. Until friday I remembered this kid and wondered at how he was doing. So I logged into fb and checked his blog. My heart sank at the comments, of tears and condolences. While reading, I was unaware that my tears started flowing too. I ran to the bathroom and grieved.You're probably thinking, "why would you grieve for someone who's not even related to you?"
At first sight, I thought he was just another baby..a really sick baby. He was on the vent, he had a feeding tube, he was on the heart monitor, had tubes in and out of his umbilical cord, his IV site wrapped in coban dressing on his right foot. To be honest, I have never seen a baby so sick and so fragile.
It turns out, he had hypochondrogenesis / Achondrogenesis Type 2 disorder, which affects bone growth, and it is a genetic disorder. Apparently this disorder affects 1 in every 40k-60k babies* (*accdng to http://ghr.nlm.nih.gov), and is characterized by short arms & legs, a small rib cage, underdeveloped lungs, and lack of ossification in the spine and pelvis (accdng to wikipedia).
At first I was just drawn to his case. This is my problem with staying in my profession, I start looking at people by disease processes and not by their humanity. As I followed the tubes and the pictures, I saw this wee thing fighting for his life, and with him, his parents who are fighting alongside him. I was touched by their strength and optimism, their care for the baby, and their bravery of facing this challenge while sharing it to the world. I was not aware of the severity of the disorder, but with people alongside this family hoping for the best, I was compelled to cheer along with them and pray for this little angel. How could such a wee thing stay brave and hang on? Why does life need to be so cruel?
This is why I think I cannot do NICU. To me babies are so tiny, so fragile, and they require delicate hands to provide care. I admire NICU nurses a lot for being so brave too.
A lot of people are blessed with life. They get to grow up, have families, go to school, meet a lot of people, visit a lot of places. But they are never contented. Sometimes they are bored. Sometimes they take life for granted. Sometimes they take their own life. This baby, he fought until the end. He showed me that life is a priviledge, he showed me how I should live life...fight for it, never take it for granted, live every moment of it, and give love and hope. For the 38 days he lived, he taught me this. And I am grateful.
Souls come and go in this life to learn a life lesson to help them transcend into God's arms. May he rest in peace...
